Going Thai-Tech: Electronic Ghost Repeller

This is fantastic. I want one. (h/t to Frank Smith).

You or someone may have experience with ghost or devil after bought new second hand house from the former owner,” the ads in beautiful Thainglish say. “Some houses may have bad spirit inside which will interfere your daily life unhappy and frighten your children. Finally many of you leave away the house and find a new home.”

“We have a solution for you, “Trisaksri Ghost Repeller”. Just place this device in side your house and switch ON. All ghost and devil will leave away your home and won’t come back again. Now who run away, you or ghost ? Save money in finding a new home. To place order, please contact us.”

How the magic little machine works? Ghost spirits usually emit a weak natural electric field:

“Trisaksri Ghost Repeller © composed of complex electronic circuit. It generates KILLER WAVE and mix with low static electric multiple fiend “Natural” EM/Microwave. The device output is extreamly sensitive to changes of as little as 0.5% of the strength of the Earth’s magnetic field. Ghost spirit usually emit weak natural electric field which can not be measured by normal meter or can not be responded by humen senses. The device has been designed to ignore the AC fields of power lines, appliances, etc. It only interact with ghost’s and animal spirit and no harm to humen health.”

Uh-oh, I’m going to hell….

I thought I’d be in Limbo, with the other virtuous pagans. But apparently not. According to the all-knowing internet, where I found a test based on Dante’s Inferno, I’ll be rocking out in the seventh level. See you there?

The Dante’s Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 – Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Very High
Level 6 – The City of Dis (Heretics)	Very High
Level 7 (Violent)	Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Very High
Level 9 – Cocytus (Treacherous)	Moderate

Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test

Found via a Facebook page, where I also found this very funny anecdote.

Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical Engineering Department,University of Oklahoma, is known for posing questions on final exams like: “Why do airplanes fly?”

In May a few years ago, the “Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer ” exam paper contained the question:

“Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with proof.”

Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law or similar. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for souls entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions, and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell. With the birth and death rates what they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change in the volume of Hell. Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of the souls and volume needs to stay constant.

[Answer 1] So, if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature in Hell willincrease until all Hell breaks loose.

[Answer 2] Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase in souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate (given to me by Teresa Banyan during freshman year) that “it’ll be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you”, and taking into account that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then [Answer 2] cannot be correct;
…… thus, Hell is exothermic.

The student got the only A.

John Bird and John Fortune Explain(ed) it All For you

I still need cheering up. Might be the narcotic painkillers I’m on messing with my emotional balance. This helped.Thanks to Raj at the ever-wonderful (but not nearly rapid enough) Stuffed and Starved Website. BTW, I’m halfway through a re-read of his book, Stuffed and Starved, and can’t say enough for the elegance and clarity of his writing and analysis on this. Go, read. now.

more about “John Bird and John Fortune Explain(ed…“, posted with vodpod

I needed a laugh

Here’s where I got it.

McCain ‘08: Cambodians Are Taller Than You Think!

Because Cambodian height just doesn’t get enough love in the news. Fast-forward to 0:50.

more about "Colbert on the first debate", posted with vodpod

Gambling on death

well, that’s what life insurance is all about, from the perspective of the insurer. They make more money if you live longer than than they expected, and lose money if you die before they guessed. So, for actuaries (the odds-fixers in this game), getting the statistics is important. Enter this little 10-question lunchtime quiz from the good folks at mental floss:

As might be expected, I received 100 percent correct marks on this one. But then, the questions weren’t really very difficult.

N.B., you can gamble on death, but eventually, the house always wins. That’s why we occasionally say someone has ‘cashed in their chips,’ my friends.

One More Funny SEASSI Video

Holy crap. You might have to know that SEASSI has a long-running and emotional volleyball tournament divided up by language teams (the Hmong usually kick everybody’s collective ass), and that the Khmer are one of the worst in the program, consistently. Also, for those who speak Khmer – check out Vishnu’s ‘antique’ pronunciation!

Funny Monday

Maybe I’ll start a new habit – Funny Monday. Here’s the first installment, based on the Greek myth of Prometheus (whose relevance remains, friends – time to steal fire from the gods, come hell, high water, or vultures).

[via]

Fun with Death

On occasion, there are just too many funny things revolving around death to ignore. Here are a few for your delectation:

Zombie Lawn Ornament. [via neatorama]

A very funny post called The Tombstone Follies posted about a misbegotten sign in a cemetary that read:

NO PLANTING WITHOUT PERMISSION

And included these two, very funny, images:

And since I’m on a roll, here’s the song I haven’t been able to get out of my head for the last two months, “Revival,” by the Soulsavers. Sung by Mark Lanegan, from my old hometown of Seattle, it includes the line “Trying to get my hands clean in dirty water.” Seems appropriate for an election year. The video is nice, too, alluding throughout to Lanegan’s struggles with alcoholism (among other addictions).

Nietzsche Family Circus

via [Neatorama]

The Nietzsche Family Circus is a randomized combination of Friedrich Nietzsche quotations and Family Circus cartoons — usually with appropriate results. Link

My personal favorite so far – obviously -

Let us beware of saying that death is the opposite of life.
The living being is only a species of the dead,
and a very rare species.